Problem Two: Being Compared

Your Asian parents might do one of the following:

1. compare your grades/music skills/manners/ you in general to other people's kids
2. complain to you about your grades/music skills/manners/ you in general after finding out there's some kid better than you
3. complain you got a A-/B+ (oh no.... it's the end of the world.... -_-)
4. tell you "when I was your age..." stories about trudging through the snow to go to school to earn that A, ect...

#1 and #2: The first thing to remember is that it is NEVER the other kids' fault. They can't help their parents comparing any more than you can help yours. Don't waste time being insulted, jealous or petty. You're all "the kids"; band together. Give them a taste of their own medicine. Compare parents. Find out things that other kids parents do better than your parents. That way, you have something to counter with the next time your parents complain to you.

Ex:

Dad: "well, [insert kid's name] got straight A's last semester; why didn't you?"

You: "well, [insert kid's Dad's name] made $100,000 last year; why didn't you?"

Your dad may not be happy afterwards, but at least he'll stop talking.

#3 and #4 can be dealt with along the same lines. Chances are, your parents didn't get perfect grades growing up either. Use your resources. There's a reason people have aunts/uncles/grandparents. Ask them about your parents' childhoods. Adults love to gossip, so most of them will be happy to tell you about the strange things your parents did as a kid. If you're smart enough, you might even be able to get your parents into telling you themselves, maybe through casual questions during dinner. Most of the "when I was your age stories" are lies, as you'll soon find out. When the unwanted subject does come up, remind your parents of their childhood mistakes and kindly remind them that like it or not, it's their blood that runs through your veins. Your intelligence is a genetic reflection of theirs. If they don't like how smart you are, maybe they should look at themselves first.

Good luck,

Puff 0f Fluff